The “Workin’ It” Workout

It’s Tuesday and while I unfortunately have to behave properly today because of a work evaluation (they are considering hiring me for a better position with a slight raise), I’m going to need everyone who reads this to pick up the slack today. Thanks.

Has anyone ever called you a name that they meant to be a taunt but just seemed so perfectly true? Me too. I was drinking with a friend on mine on Friday night (mmm… Pirate’s Punch…) and while making fun of me for eating sausage suggestively he called me a virgin slut. Um, yes. And your point is?

So, when it comes to working out I have a strong opposition to anything that sucks. I hate the elliptical, exercise bike, and anything monotonous. I don’t want to be bored, tuning out, possibly drooling, and thinking about how much cardio sucks while working out. I like things that are concise, varied, require intense focus, etc. If I have time to compose a poem in my head about how much this workout sucks or the mental energy to be counting down to the end of the workout, I’m just not going to do it. I don’t have the willpower and, frankly, I think that willpower is overrated.

Why not try a workout where you really get to work it?

Clubbing: Your exertion from dancing must be greater than your alcohol intake, if not; you cannot consider this a workout. This one is my personal preference because I can spend several hours dancing and not feel tired. It isn’t until I’m away from the music that I realize how sore and exhausted I am. There are so many reasons to love this one.

Strip Tease Workout: I admit, I’ve never tried this but I really like the idea of it. I would personally avoid mirrors while doing this, though, because I wouldn’t be able to take it seriously. I’d end up only working my abs from laughter.

Pole Dancing Workout: A variation of the last one but it sounds even more intense. You’ve got to be freaking strong to be about to do some of those moves. Again, I’ve never tried this one but I like the idea of this one too.

Zumba: Significantly less sketchy than the last two but it looks like a blast. I’ve wanted to try this for a while.

Hip Hop Workout: I used to do this when I was a member of this super swank gym. I freaking loved it. It was like “how to pretend you’re in a rap video without having to ditch your pink yoga pants.” The best of both worlds? Maybe not. I’d like to do more of these types of classes though. I really like learning choreography… nine years as a ballet dancer does that to you.

Bollywood Workout: I want to take one of these classes so freaking bad. It looks like one of the most fun things ever.

Belly Dance: There is so little that actually needs to be said about this one. Give me the jingly thingies.

Ballet: I know, I know. Most of you are probably like “WTF?” but after being a dancer, very little turns me on like ballet. Yes, I know it isn’t normal. Don’t judge me. No, go ahead.

There are a thousand other types of awesome dances that would be fun to try for a workout and I intend to try as many as I can.

Any “skanky” workouts you’re particularly fond of?

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