Today I don’t want to talk about weight loss. I’ve been obsessing and need to talk about other things. Today I want to talk about butterflies and sunshine and bubblegum pink pistols that remind people of me (don’t ask… actually please do!).

I want to think about how much I love my nails painted sparkly red (China Glaze: Ruby Pumps) and how I don’t care that the ring I wear every day clashes with the bracelet I wear every day. I mean, if you whore out your best friend’s hugs in Tijuana for a bracelet, you damn well better wear it every day.

Today I’d prefer to wax poetically on how much I love my city, especially when it’s sunny (all two days out of the year). I’d rather discuss the fact that most of my clothing belongs in the closet of a seven year old and how I don’t care.

I’d rather tell you the story about why I’m terrified of geese. No, really, I am. I’m about 98% sure that all geese are feather covered Satans. Once, one of the biggest demon geese I’d ever seen actually chased and bit my dog. George was a Black Lab/German Shepard/Golden Retriever mix. That dog had huge teeth and was almost big enough to resemble the dog in The Sandlot. He could have kicked Clifford’s ass in a fight. That was George. And yet, the demon goose took him down.

Geese are EVIL.

I’ve really wanted to share that for a long time.

They’re pretty much the only thing I’m afraid of, except for rejection.

My ear just started bleeding, I just thought I’d share.

Don’t ever get your cartilage pierced at a piercing pagoda, you’ll never stop having issues with it.

By the way, as soon as I remember how to use my camera, I’ll be posting new progress pictures. Feel free to oogle me.

Leave a Comment

queerveganrunner April 22, 2011, 3:23 am

Geese. Running around the lake on my campus as an undergrad during the spring. Geese, I don't want your stupid babies stop chasing me and hissing at me.

I am terrified of all birds though. When I was a small child a pigeon flew up my skirt. Seriously I can't make this crap up.

marisol April 22, 2011, 3:37 am

If you like sparkly polish, check out OPI's Teenage Dream. So pink & sparkly!

Anonymous April 23, 2011, 2:00 pm

so glad you're back and feeling better!

and geese are terrifying. one time i was floating on a raft in a lake and they started swimming towards me like warships b/c i had accidentally floated too close to their baby. i screamed and got out of that water as fast as possible.